How do I stop my toddler using a bottle?: Gentle Techniques for Parents and Carers

Well...it's not a bottle right?

Reducing bottle use in toddlerhood can prove challenging for many parents and of course isn't always a great experience for your little one either! So how do we do this without causing too must distress to either parent or child? Look no further! This guide is packed full of gentle techniques that you can implement at your own pace to slowly reduce bottles. Happy reading....!

So why now? Why should you reduce bottle use after the age of 1?

Continued bottle use after the age of one can start impacting dental health and speech. Prolonged bottle use through the night when drinking milk can lead to tooth decay because the milk just sits there and your baby's teeth are exposed to the sugars in milk (yes, milk contains sugars). If your little one uses a bottle frequently through the day for milk feeds, this can also disrupt their eating and mealtime routines and if they use a bottle as a comforter or pacifier, it can start impacting speech and oral development as they get older.

When to begin?

Reducing bottle use is the second step..the first step is actually familiarity and skill building for cup/beaker/straw use which begins around 6 months of age. Practising drinking from containers other than bottles regularly will help the transition later on. If you follow me on social media then you will know that I am always talking about open cups...yes they are my absolute fav! As long as you avoid sippy cups with a valve that basically act as a stand in for a bottle (it really is pointless).

Once your toddler is confident and happy taking liquids from a cup/beaker, you then need to decide precisely when to begin. Pick a time where there are no other stressors like starting nursery, moving home, new baby on the way (temptations when watching the new baby if they have a bottle) and when you have the most help/support at home.

How do I do this gradually?

The definition of "gradual" is different for all. You have to pick what suits you and your family, and of course your little one. Some toddlers are more emotionally sensitive to change than others and may need more time..... this is ok. Whilst others ...well, let's just say that it's better to just crack on and get it done!

If you are starting off with a significant number of bottles day and night, then reduce one day time bottle and replace with a drink from a cup/beaker. Do this once every couple of days until all day time bottles have been replaced. We can then move onto night time bottles. These one are usually a little more "tricky" especially if they are comfort bottles or used as a sleep association. No one approach is correct but it may help to transition slowly to avoid feeling overwhelmed with big changes.

What do I offer instead?

So I have already talked about open cups and avoiding beakers or anything with a valve that requires a sucking like you do from a bottle (straws are fine). But this isn't always as easy as it sounds, refusing these "alternatives" is common and expected. So you can try to make the transition smoother by taking advantage of character/branded cups which can be marginally more enticing! Allowing your toddler to "choose" a cup can also help them to feel involved in the process and increase the chances of them accepting the alternative.

Do I need to have a routine?

Yes and no... no if you don't want to ...but if you don't mind a bit of structure then then a routine can really help you both out. If you don't already have a mealtime/ snack time/ bedtime routine...get one going the best you can. Remove bottles from sleep and nap time routines and have set mealtimes where possible, offering drinks in cups alongside each meal/snack. In general, as babies grow into toddlerhood, routines can give them a sense of security and predictability in relation to their environment and this consistency can help them feel more comfortable with the changes that you have made or will be making.

Will I have to buy a star chart?

Personally, I think reward "systems" work better with older children. When they can remember that the system is in place... (I am not judging anyone who recommends or uses star charts... this is just my opinion!). In toddlerhood, my experience is that praise through means of language, touch, connection works more effectively. Be aware though that some toddlers don't appreciate a loud celebration for taking a sip from a cup and this may be off putting, whilst others may thrive off the attention- go with what suits your little one. You can celebrate small victories with a simple "great job! shall we go wash up the cup?" and the reward is letting them splash... I mean wash up the cup..

Be kind to yourself...

I say this ALL the time to parents... we are the first to question our own abilities and decision making when it comes to motherhood/parenthood. It absolutely will feel like you are taking something away from your baby. There may be tears...for both! and as patient as you will try to remain, you will have times where it is easier to just give in. Now you would think that the answer here is "do not give in"...but it really isn't. Have you ever walked into an office and seen a fully grown adult drinking a latte from a baby bottle? "no".... your little one will eventually give up the bottle....and it is okay if things change or something has happened that means you have to stop and start again after a few days.

Giving in more than a couple of times though isn't great because it disrupts that structure and routine that you will have already put in place. It takes you back to starting position each time and undoes your progress, further prolonging the situation so be brave when you can!

What if the bottle is my toddler's emotional comfort or sleep aid?

This one is really quite straight forward... introduce another comforter. Before your start reducing bottle use, you might want to offer them a stuffed toy/teddy/muslin...something else that is safe for them to have to sleep with or take to nursery with for example. It is important to do this before taking the bottle away- giving them a teddy when they are mid tantrum and upset, dis-regulated, crying for the bottle..is not going to feel comforting. If anything, they will most likely associate the teddy turning up as a sign that the bottle is getting taken away. When it comes to bedtime bottles, you could replace the bottle with a back rub, gentle hair strokes and cuddles.

Get them involved- everyone..

Talk about the transition with them and with people around you for example: "tell nanny about your new cup!", "would you like to pour your own drink into your cup?" or "shall we ask [sibling] to help find your new teddy for nap time?". Use language and communication in a way that helps your child to predict and understand and try to use words to reassure them and give them the reward that we talked about earlier. Giving them a sense of control and involving people around them

can help them to be more willing to participate and make the process more exciting.

What if they reduce their water/milk intake?

This is a common worry....especially if your toddler is reliant on the bottle for all of their fluid intake. Firstly we will build cup use prior to reducing bottles so that should help to keep them drinking. Secondly, think of other ways to incorporate fluid and calcium into their diet. Yoghurts, butter, cheese are good substitutes for cow's milk. You can incorporate milk into meals. If your toddler struggles with taking enough water, consider offering more "wet" foods and fruits. Monitor nappy output and seek medical review if you are worried about hydration levels.

What is the water down method?

The water down method is where you would slowly "water down" the cow's milk in your toddler's bottle by adding more and more water gradually until they refused the bottle themselves. This can work, as can simply swapping the bottle of milk with a bottle of water. Water won't cause as much of an issue for tooth decay if you are still trying to reduce bottles and if things are not progressing as quickly as expected. Remember that formula should never be "watered down".

Seek support and advice if you are struggling

Everyone has to be on board so make sure that you discuss with any other adults, main care givers and older children in the family what your plans are and ask for help with what you are doing. Make contact with your Health Visitor/ GP if you are struggling. Register your little one with a dentist to keep an eye on their teeth and if you have any worries about speech, seek onward referral to a speech and language therapist. If you would like a tailored plan that suits your needs, then of course you can get in touch with me too!

Shami x

If you can get your baby to drink from an open cup, you won't need to carry around a "special" beaker/water bottle when you are out and about....so much easier!